Ready to go beyond talk therapy and find lasting change?
Haley Tolman, LCSW
IFS & EMDR Therapist in Utah
The perfectionism, over-thinking, and big emotions can feel like too much sometimes.
You don’t need someone to tell you that “it’s not that bad” or that you “need to get over it.” You want to get to the root of your pain in a way that doesn’t feel overwhelming, so you can feel more calm and confident again.
I get it.
Being sensitive isn’t a bad thing
If you’re looking for a therapist who gets what its like to be sensitive AND can help you get to the root of your anxiety, trauma & relationship challenges - then you’re in the right place!
hi, I’m haley
I help sensitive women who want lasting change and calmness, but just need a little help to get there.
I help my clients find more calmness and self-compassion, by guiding them through a process to better understand themselves and the impact of their past experiences.
Many approaches to anxiety, trauma, and relationships can feel like they just scratch the surface - making it hard to feel real change. Together we’ll go deeper.
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By sensitive, I mean people who feel things deeply, are highly empathetic, tend to be perfectionistic, have high expectations of themselves, and find it easy to get overwhelmed. There is a term for this biological trait called a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). It’s not a disorder or mental illness, it’s someone who has a sensitive nervous system.
Never heard of an HSP? Click here to learn more.
How I work
I genuinely welcome every part of you in therapy.
I’ve seen that by listening to all the different parts of you, it can bring clarity to what is really going on and bolster more compassion towards yourself. I’m talking about the anxious parts, the critical parts, the angry parts, the parts of you that try to do everything right, and the parts that feel sad and hurt.
You’ve done everything you can think of already - tried to ignore them, be perfect, numb-out with Netflix or social media, think positively, or even tried therapy before. And yet, it doesn’t seem to bring the change you are looking for. I can help you better understand these parts of yourself, so you feel less conflicted, anxious, and overwhelmed.
First
We’ll get to know each other. We’ll talk about what’s important to you, what works well for you, what doesn’t, and address any fears you might have.
Then
We’ll explore the internal dynamics and patterns you are noticing. We’ll identify any blocks or concerns, and pinpoint past experiences that have been difficult for you.
Next
I’ll guide you through some internal work to gain clarity, shift your reactions and feel more self-compassion. We may reprocess past experiences to reduce stress & overwhelm.
Finally
We’ll determine what other supports might be helpful. Then you can reflect on new insights you’ve gained, mindfulness practices, and ways of meeting your needs better.
I want you to know that…
My training in IFS and EMDR therapy means I have the experience to help you do the deep work, and finally see change. I’m passionate about the transformative power of befriending yourself, and consider it a privilege to work with you in the process. I love seeing how my clients change their relationship with themselves and shift deep-rooted beliefs for the better.
I also want you to know that you’re working with someone who “gets” what it means to be sensitive. I get it, because I’m also a highly sensitive person (HSP) and understand the deep feelings, the overwhelm, and tendency to try doing everything perfectly.
I know that doing deep work requires a safe space, choice in the process, and moving gently through difficult things. Painful experiences can be impactful, but it doesn’t mean they define who you are or have to keep you stuck. Sometimes all we need is a little help to feel better, especially if you’ve already tried so hard to change on our own.
Therapy with me is…
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I hold a strong belief in the power of compassion, and how it can transform the way we feel towards ourself and others.
I will approach your unique challenges with COMPASSION, not criticism.
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I have specific training that helps us go beyond coping skills and talk therapy. I will help you make sense of your inner world and reduce the impact of stressful past experiences.
I’m here to guide you through the process and get to the root of your challenges. No temporary bandaids or telling you to " just try harder" here.
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I understand the need to move gently through challenging experiences and emotions, so it's not too overwhelming.
I provide as much choice as possible to you through the process, while still maintaining a focus on your goals.
I want you to see the change you are looking for, while still listening to your own needs during the process.
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My holistic approach means I'm working with all parts of you, not just one aspect. I help you connect to the parts that make you who you are (even the ones you might not like), and gain clarity on your inner experience.
I consider your overall physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual wellness - not just a diagnosis.
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I'm LGBTQ+ affirming, and welcome all races, religions, and backgrounds in my practice.
I strive to be inclusive and informed on the biases I might hold with each of my clients.
My Training & Education
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-Master of Social Work - Boston College
-Bachelor of Social Work - Utah State University
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-Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) - Utah
-License #: 12396181-3501
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-IFS Therapist:
Level 1- IFS Institute
Level 2- IFS Institute
Program assistant for IFS level 1 trainings
Participation in ongoing IFS consultation
-EMDR Therapist:
Certified EMDR Therapist: EMDR International Association
EMDR Basic Training: EMDR-HAP
EMDR Advanced Trainings:
EMDR & Complex Trauma
Treating Dissociative Disorders with EMDR
EMDR for Suicidal & Self-Harming Behaviors
-IFS & Highly Sensitive People:
IFS Conference Extended Workshop
-Therapy Intensives:
Intensive Design Lab- training for implementing intensives
